


Choose Your Deity Carefully

by LargeBeefFriedRice



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: AU, Character gets suckered into helping him, Deviates From Canon, F/M, I honestly don't even know and I'm writing it, Loki - Freeform, Loki AU, Loki is Up To Something, Maybe later though?, Multi, Nonsexual worshipping, Other, Slow Burn, archive warnings could change later, random idea
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-09-02
Updated: 2018-09-06
Packaged: 2019-07-05 18:21:43
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 6,938
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15869184
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LargeBeefFriedRice/pseuds/LargeBeefFriedRice
Summary: After weeks of continuous bad luck, I finally had enough and mistakenly called out that I would worship any deity that helped turn my luck around. Enter Loki: God of Mischief, Chaos, Lies, and an overall primadonna.This all leads up to some universally problematic issues. But I'll get to that later. First, let me rehash how everything went down.





	1. Bad Luck Personified

**Author's Note:**

> I'm still unsure how dragged out this story might become. It's in the air but I needed something fun to write while I decide what to do about the Terrible Tom series. 
> 
> Anyway. You don't have to comment or anything. I just hope you enjoy.

Ever since I could remember, I had always loved Saturdays. Most likely because it was the first free day you have when attending school. But even as I got older--- and had other commitments that warranted eating up my free time--- I had still always loved that day.

Until a few weeks ago.

My luck had radically changed and the worse of it always happened on the first day of the weekend.

I was constantly being called into work (even though we weren't open on Saturdays), whole baskets of laundry would disappear as soon as the washer or dryer would shut off at the laundry mat, drinks were spilled, food dropped and stepped on, dogs chasing me on my walk home, nice clothes ripping, and lots and lots of puddles but no rain.

While some of my bad luck would seep into other parts of the week, like Megan from accounting losing my paycheck two weeks in a row, Saturday still took the brunt of the force. It was honestly starting to really bum me out.

This particular day, I was finding myself trying to wave down a taxi with one shoe missing, half of my hair shorter than the rest, and fake blood smeared down my thighs. I don't even want to go into the details on how all of this happened. Let's just say I was never going to agree to attend a nephew's birthday party at Chucky Cheese's ever again.

After the fifth unoccupied taxi blew past me, I let myself slouch against the 'no littering' sign next to me and started to full on sob.

_Dear Reader, I am not afraid to tell you that they were no-punches-pulled cries and wails that left my mouth at that moment._

What makeup I had been able to put on was most likely streaking and blotting across my cheeks as tears flowed unbidden from my eyes.

Pitifully, I heard myself say, "Why does this shit keep happening? Am I not praying enough or something? I will literally worship whatever deity I have to if it means my luck changes."

_There was no way I could have known what was coming. If I had then I would never have uttered those words._

But I'm not capable of messing with the flow of time, like some people, so when a gentle warm breeze had suddenly brushed against me on that cool October day... I had let it trick me into relaxing and feeling hopeful.

_Which is probably what made me so accepting of the small bit of luck that happened next._

The wind had soothed my emotional mind just enough that I had stood myself back up straight and attempted to wipe at the makeup melting down my face.

That was when a black Toyota Venza had pulled up in front of me and the window had rolled down quickly to reveal a tall, dark-haired man wearing a nondescript black hoodie.

"Excuse me, Madam," his baritone voice eased my frayed nerves immediately and I found myself moving closer to the car without a second thought to my safety, "I'm here to pick up Adelia Bergs?"

All I could do was blink owlishly at him. I hadn't ordered or called for a car. That was one of my other bad luck moments: I'd left my phone sitting in the bathroom in my apartment. At least I hope that's where I left it.

"That's my name but I think you must be looking for another Adelia Bergs since I didn't call for a car," I said while trying not to sound disappointed and also like I could cry again at any moment. Not that I really felt that way, what with his beautiful green eyes watching me carefully, but I just knew how easy it was to make me start balling.

He looked down at the console of the vehicle before picking up and reaching out his phone for me to see, "Is this your address? Because that's where I'm heading."

At that moment I was so alarmed and shocked to see my address that I completely failed to hear the snicker he released at my gasp and blindly missed his impish grin when I dumbly nodded my head.

"Yeah, that's so weird. I don't know how this happened but I guess you're taking me home."

Then I did the stupidest thing any woman has ever done. I stepped into the unmarked vehicle of a man who somehow knew my name and address even though I hadn't given it to him.

_It was assuredly the worst my luck had ever been._

~

"Oh, it would have been way easier to turn down that street. I guess it's okay. This way just takes longer," he seemed not to notice my soft words as he continued to just drive along with traffic.

After hopping into the back of the wagon--- have you ever seen a Venza? it's a wagon--- I'd tried to secretively use the rearview mirror to clean up my face but ended up stopping when I caught the reflection of his piercing eyes squinting back at me.

"I think for the things we need to talk about... the long way is the best way."

Before he was even done with his sentence, his body had suddenly vanished in a quick glow of green light and reappeared next to me in the backseat.

I almost screamed. Truly, I impressed myself by not screeching loudly and not jumping forward into the driver seat to grab the steering wheel. I think it was because after he had reappeared, my mind had immediately noticed that the wheel was still moving.

Clearly, magic. As if I didn't already know that from the teleportation act but I just readily accepted it.

Why not? My day had been really strange and shitty up to this point anyway.

Plus, I lived in a world where a guy had been woken up from an ice block after 70 years and my second cousin (twice removed) went to a school for people with superpowers.

So, instead of panicking about magic, I freaked out about a strange man suddenly sitting close to me in the back seat of a vehicle.

"Hold your horses there, mortal. I'm not going to eat you," a devilish grin spread across his slim face, as he surprisingly grabbed my hands in a gentle grip to stop me from pulling at the door handle, "unless you really want me to."

"No, that's quite alright. No eating here tonight. Thank you," I tried to smile back, a nervous habit, but still struggled to pull my hands back to myself. It's not like I knew what to do with my hands once I got them free but that didn't stop me from wishing he'd release them.

"Okay. But just know that I grant more favors for sexual acts," his words brought my struggling to a halt and he finally let go of my wrists with a haunting chuckle.

"Favors? Sexual acts?"

"Well, you said you'd worship any deity that helped you, right?"

I just sat there silently. The fact that this guy somehow knew about me saying that led me to believe that there was really no need to answer him. Yet, he arched a dark eyebrow at me and waited until I finally nodded my head.

The motion made me feel a little dizzy and I murmured, "How can you help me?"

The tall man--- deity? god?--- huffed playfully and waved his hand close to me, causing gold sparks and mist to appear and swirl in the air.

The magic seemed to move and dance until a smaller, golden form of myself appeared. Tiny me peeped up and then quickly looked away in a bashful manner. Seemingly embarrassed about me looming over her.

"For every act of worship or offering that you make to me," tiny me turned to the man and curtsied low for him, "I will grant you a favor. Like a day of good luck in exchange for some pretty graffiti art, as an example. But the bigger the favor asked then the pricier the offering I will require."

The little gold version of myself jumped around the middle of the seat. It was honestly kind of hard to guess what kind of tasks she was acting out in order to please the deity, but the way his eyes gleefully scrunched up at the sight of her made me wish to know. Whether to actually perform them or avoid them I was unsure of.

"Am I allowed to refuse?"

My tinier version suddenly glowered up at me in shock, her hand coming up to cover her mouth before she slowly seemed to blow away into dust.

When I lifted my eyes from her disappearing particles I was a little unnerved to find the man staring blankly at me. His eyes were dark and his facial expression was tight but neutral.

That was apparently the wrong thing for me to say. Though if I could go back to even this moment, I'd have warned myself to stick with being apprehensive.

"You could," he finally, carefully said. "But where would be the fun in that?"

His face still gave nothing away and we rode in silence for a few more moments; with us just staring at one another.

Was I up for the task of actually actively worshipping someone? Not someone. Something?

What if he asked for a virgin sacrifice? I did not have the balls to do that. I couldn't even commit to "accidentally" tripping people; there was no way I was going to murder someone just to please an otherworldly being.

I let myself look out my window for roughly a minute before glancing back at him and asking, "Can I think about it?"

This seemed to renew him and a half smirk appeared while he reassured me, "Of course, of course. I'd think a couple days would be fair. Wouldn't you say?"

Not really sure why he asked if that was fair since he gave me no time to answer. My hand was suddenly being firmly grasped in his and bobbed up and down in a handshake.

"I will see you later then, darling," the dark-haired deity made to open the car door, even though the vehicle was still moving, and I quickly yelped and tried to reach out for him.

My fingers stopped just an inch away from his hoodie and I stared unblinkingly at him. He was no longer retreating from the car but instead was fixing me with a half amused, half anxious glare. I couldn't convince my body to move and had to helplessly  
watch as he brought his hand up to press his fingertips against mine.

"It's best to not touch me without my permission. I'd hate to take it the wrong way."

Was the wrong way considered sexual or violent? That was all my mind could come up with for what he was implying. Which stung a little since truly I had reached out to try and help him NOT end up as roadkill.

Thankfully, I found that I was at least allowed to talk, "How will I contact you to let you know if I made up my mind?"

His fingertips retreated and his voice dropped lower than before as he said, "Perform your first act of worship, mortal."

I fell into the seat as my body suddenly moved and finished reaching out to him. But my hand came up empty and I sprung back up to look around. Now the backseat was void of anything but myself.

"Sweetheart, we're here," a cheery feminine voice from the front seat drawled at me and I whipped my head around to the source.

In the driver's seat sat a younger woman, probably just starting college, turned in the seat looking back at me. Her brown eyes gazed over my half leaning pose and her face scrunched up in confusion as she asked, "Did my driving knock you around back there?"

"No, no," I quickly assured her while patting my pockets for my wallet. I could feel every ounce of blood drain from my face when every pocket came up surprisingly walletless.

The only recovery I could think of was, "I was just looking to see if my wallet had fallen out back here. I can't seem to find it anywhere which makes me think I left it at the party. I'm not sure how I'm going to pay you."

"Wow, that sucks, hon! Maybe you should try and call a friend to look for it? But at least someone already paid for this ride for you."

Owlish blinking habits returned.

"The ride was paid for. By who?"

She scrambled to grab her phone from its mount on the dashboard and hurriedly brought it to her face. She typed and swiped before saying, "It failed to put the last name on here. But the first name is Loki."

"What?"

I was stuck between feeling confused and admittedly scared, while she seemed to find it funny.

"I guess someone pranked you."

_Oh, yes, dear driver. I was in for a very long and embarrassing prank._


	2. Terms and Conditions

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh boy. Another chapter.

There's a 90's country song that goes something like, ' _...before I know it Saturdays gone, but it's Sunday now and you can bet that I'm alright._ '

Indeed, the Sunday following my run in with Loki was quite uneventful. Which was marvelous for me.

I'd stayed in my apartment and nothing bad happened to me. My cable didn't cut out, all the neighbors were surprisingly quiet, and someone even ordered a pizza that I got because somehow the driver had the wrong address but also somehow had an extra pizza.

That last one I was very suspicious about and wondered if my potential new deity had anything to do with it. If he had then I was pretty prepared to accept becoming a worshipper. My only problem was that I was still a skeptic and wanted proof that this act was tied to him.

Especially since he didn't seem like the type to do good will favors or at least not without some fanfare. Even if it was just to convince me to convert.

But by Monday, I was back to dragging my feet and attempting to not cry at every misfortune that befell me.

The bakery I went to every Monday was closed due to a handful of health code violations, my bus drove right by my stop, and the sole to one of my flats suddenly started tearing away. Forcing me to walk to work with my stomach growling and my foot aching from the continuous slap of my sole smacking into my heel with every step.

I tried to reason that this is just stuff that happens to people.

Especially stuff that happens to me. But it was just getting more and more unusual how much happened in one day. Even one week. Hell, I'd go so far as to even say a month!

But I'd be damned if it didn't make me more tempted to take up Loki's offer.

The temptation rose when Megan from accounting visited me on the third floor to ask me again how to spell my name and, "Oh, weird. I'm not even showing you on the payroll now."

It reached its climax when I went to go take my lunch and found that someone had eaten all of my food before putting my empty lunch sack back into the fridge with a note that said, 'Should have put your name on it.'

My full name was still visible on the wrinkled up bag.

After lunch, I had returned to my desk and started researching what I could about Loki and then, once I'd learned some mythology, started looking up what kind of offerings Norse Gods accepted.

I'd opened a couple different tabs from some sketchy looking websites but had to admit they seemed pretty detailed. Though some of the stuff went over my head--- was I supposed to actually find real dragon blood or just the incense?--- I felt confident that it would be easy to keep the trickster pleased with small tokens of worship. Who doesn't like alcohol and burying coins in exchange for good luck?

I was about to Google and see if there were particular prayers or something required of me when my computer screen suddenly went black.

I tapped, banged, and pleaded with the screen to come back on. I even unplugged and replugged in the tower to try and get the piece of shit working. But, inevitably, I had to accept defeat and call someone from IT to come look at it.

It was while I was waiting that everything fully cemented into my mind. Full acceptance of Loki's deal washed over me, as I realized that I was going to have to explain to some tech guy why I was looking up Norse mythology when I was supposed to actually be working.

~~

Later that night, I set to work making a sort of altar spot for him in my living room. All of the blogs I'd seen had dedicated the color green to him so I went with it. I'd bought green candles, incenses, a tiny planting pot for whatever coins I found around the apartment, and a pretty fake plant.

The plant was really more for me but it seemed to fit on the crate I bought for all my worshipping needs so I left it there.

The faint aroma of burning meat started flooding my apartment as I lit the candle and incenses and carefully placed them away from the plastic leaves of my plastic hydrangea.

That was another thing I had ended up learning. Not from my computer but from the IT person sent to fix the damn thing. After she had tried to explain to me what was wrong with the computer, thankfully not a virus, she had then chatted me up on the content still sitting guiltily in my browser.

Apparently, she was a major history buff and had been more than pleased to tell me about how people would go so far as to burn meat as a form of sacrifice to the old gods. Something about how it symbolized their level of devotion since they were willing to give up valuable food to keep the deities happy.

It made sense after she explained it and I even agreed to talk to her more about it over lunch one day; partially because I wanted to know more and partially as a way to thank her for her willingness not to tell anyone that I hadn't been working.

Of course, I didn't really have money to go out and buy meat specifically for this so I had to accept the burning crisp death of a roast I'd planned to make for dinner that night. Maybe I'd ask for a favor that involved Megan from accounting since I felt like this was somewhat her fault.

But as the meat burned, the candles flickered, and the incense tickled my nose, I realized nothing was happening. I'd completely forgot to finish looking up what else I was supposed to do to actually summon Loki back to me. I should have asked the IT woman.

So, I did the only thing I had some knowledge of and kneeled beside the homemade shrine and bowed my head to pray.

"Loki. I don't even know what I'm supposed to say in a prayer. But I'd like to discuss the deal you offered me. Umm. Very interested. Thank you."

That was good. Right?

Still, nothing happened.

I stayed kneeling next to the altar for a few more moments before finally deciding to go check on the meat. The way my luck had been running I was risking sending my apartment up in a fiery blaze from my antics.

I rounded the corner into the kitchen and stopped dead in my tracks at the sight. My prayer had been answered.

Loki sat crossed legged on the island, staring worriedly at my oven, and mindlessly rubbing at his chin.

It is still not clear if he just happened to notice me standing there or if I had maybe made a gaspy noise, but his eyes suddenly flicked my way and he finally said, "Mortal, you know that you have a perfectly ruined piece of roast in here, right?"

'Yeah, it's a sacrifice or something for you."

The arched eyebrow look again, "How mundane and wasteful. We could have had that for dinner."

The annoyance that surged through my body helped me move into action and I stomped further into my kitchen to turn the oven off and 'save' the roast from it's burning coffin.

"Well, it's not like you told me how I was supposed to call upon you or anything."

He didn't respond as he continued eyeing the roast. Even as it sat burnt and black on the stovetop. I'd never been great at reading people but it almost seemed like he had a hungry gleam in his eyes.

It was enough of a glint that I decided to risk it and ask, "I can fix something to eat if that's really what you want?"

He licked his lips, slowly, before answering, "No. I don't have time for that now. We need to talk about you doing a better job as my acolyte."

How long had he been in here staring at the charred hunk of meat? I tried to think about how long I had been in the living room preparing but honestly couldn't remember.

"I haven't actually agreed to it yet."

"But you want to. I already know," his hands rolled around one another, causing a flash of green light to abrupt in the empty space between them. The light blindly filled the whole kitchen and then quickly faded to reveal a rolled up scroll.

As his right hand grabbed at the floating parchment paper, his shockingly green eyes finally looked away from the roast and pinned me with a fiendish smile.

Loki held the paper out to me and softly spoke, "This is the terms and conditions."

Hesitantly, I reached out and gingerly took the scroll from him. A thought flitted through my mind and briefly, I paused and wondered if I was technically accepting the offer just by taking the paper.

But curiosity was my worst enemy and I clutched the paper a little tighter and fully pulled it from his hand.

His mirthful expression only grew as he watched me unravel the scroll and scrupulously read over it.

"Wait. I thought I was the one asking you for favors?"

"I said that there would be times I would require acts from you. Those are just the ones that I know about ahead of time."

"You want me to help you gain how many new followers?! You are the same guy who attacked New York aren't you?"

This only earned me a quick scowl before the God of Mischief recovered and replied, "Yes, but look at the benefits."

"Literally the benefits of me helping you get that many worshippers are that you don't kill me. I could always refuse to not accept this deal and not die. Right?" I didn't wait for him to answer as something popped into my brain, "Why do you even need this?

What are you really getting out of 'helping' me?"

Loki tsked me and shook his head disdainfully as if I was stepping out of line by asking such a question. I gave him another second or two before it became obvious that he had no intention of clarifying anything.

I wish this had rattled me more than it did at that moment. But sadly I just accepted his silence and had gone back to reading over the terms and conditions. Letting myself get swept up into the whirlwind chaos of the God of Mischief.

"So, you don't have an actual church?"

"Ew, no."

"Where are people supposed to go to pray to you then?"

He childishly turned up his nose and crossed his arms, "Praying is terrible and I want no part of it. It's dull, unimaginative, and normal."

"How am I suppose to truly worship you then? How am I supposed to communicate with you when I can't find you?"

These were the right questions and his jade eyes fixed on me with a flare of excitement.

With a quick and loud snap of his fingers, a second scroll appeared in his left hand. He pointed at me with the rolled up paper and hissed, "Once you sign and agree to that paper, I will gladly hand over this list of everything you'll need to know for proper  
offerings and all the works. Plus, I'll go over how to send word to me."

My eyes narrowed and kept glancing back and forth between Loki's smug, long face and the scroll resting loosely in his hand.

_Again, past me should have followed her gut on how shaken she'd felt at having heard that the_ actual _required acts were being kept on a different paper for_ AFTER _she sold her soul._

_But whatever. I'm still here. For now._

"Are you actually going to kill me if I don't succeed with your side mission?"

'No. Too messy. I'm already in enough trouble. But I can make your life very miserable."

That obviously didn't sound promising but the allure of having a year of better luck somehow won out in my mind. If my death was messy then no way he would actually really commit to tormenting me forever. Right?

"Also, I don't have to have sex with you, right? If that's on that paper in your hands then I refuse."

An exasperated huff, "No. That's not on the paper."

"Okay then, God of Mischief and Chaos," I paused when he held a finger up as if to correct me, but he scrunched his nose up instead and motioned for me to continue, "Get me a pen and I'll agree to a year of being your lackey."

"Wonderful," another snap of his fingers and a pen apparated into my right hand, "this is going to be so much fun."

As I signed the document in my hand I noticed that a symbol had appeared in the section marked off for Loki to sign. It didn't surprise me that he'd use magic instead of his own hand but I couldn't make out what it was supposed to be.

"What is that symbol for?"

"It's my corresponding rune."

"Oh."

And just like that the ink of the paper glimmer and glowed in a golden aura before I had to slightly shake my head and blink rapidly. It looked as if there were double words on the paper and I couldn't figure out why my brain was hallucinating that.

Except my mind wasn't.

The doubled ink suddenly pulled itself together at the bottom of the paper and then slowly bled and trickled its way towards my left hand. I gasped and roughly started shaking my hand, trying to get it to let go of the scroll.

But my fingers held tight against my will and the wild shaking did nothing to deter the ink from continuing its path now towards the inside of my wrist. Once it had all gathered there the ink started to sizzle against my flesh and then evaporated completely  
by the time I could even release a pained howl.

Where the ink had just been there was now a seared version of "Loki's rune" resting on my pink and inflamed skin.

"What the hell!? I didn't agree to be branded!"

The God of Mischief laughed hardily at my indignation and even slapped his hand on his knee a few times.

The merriment ended just as suddenly as it had begun and in its place, an exhausted expression took over Loki's face. It was as if he'd aged a couple sleepless years in an instant. Dark circles rested below his eyes and some frown lines were a little more  
visible next to his mouth.

With a tired sigh, he held out the other scroll and murmured, "Hold on to both of those papers. They are going to be your best tools for the next year."

I'm not even sure what had happened to the pen--- and I never gave it any thought until just now--- but I reached out my right hand and tugged the paper quickly from him. Not wanting anymore more trickery tonight.

He simply arched another brow in amusement and then blinked out of existence.

Leaving me standing alone in my kitchen with a burnt roast and two old ass looking scrolls.

"Okay. So. That all happened," I muttered while making my way back towards the shrine in the living room, "Though I don't know what I'm going to do about work since I'm not allowed to have a tattoo."

With my own weary sigh, I blew out all the still burning candles and snuffed out what was left of the incense. Then I rolled the contract up and placed it neatly next to my new fake plant.

I'd intended to just leave the new scroll rolled up with the contract, and look at it tomorrow, but something tickled at that back of my head and wouldn't let up until I started to unfurl the parchment.

Sure enough, my hands began shaking and one of my eyes started to twitch rapidly.

"THIS PAPER IS BLANK, YOU SON OF A BITCH!"

I had failed to consider that Loki was not just the God of Mischief. Not just the God of Chaos.

But most importantly... he was the **God of Lies**.


	3. Do I Look To Be In A Gaming Mood?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> First favors and first payments are finally, somewhat, agreed upon.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kind of a short chapter.
> 
> My apologies.
> 
> But I'm working with a tiny amount of time this week and wanted to get this going some more before I lose steam.
> 
> Thank you, lovelies, for the comments so far! 
> 
> ;)  
> Here we go.

It was roughly another week before the Primadonna of Lies tried to contact me again.

I had pretty much started giving up hope that anything that had happened was real. I would have thrown the stupid scrolls out if it wasn't for the mostly healed burn on the inside of my left wrist.

His corresponding rune. It did nothing as far as I could tell. I'd tried rubbing it, talking to it, and smearing unspeakable substances (don't judge me) in an attempt to see if that was how I was supposed to summon him.

But nothing ever happened.

So, my first lunch with Trisha, the amazing IT lady, I had asked for her advice. Of course, she thought I was joking and also thought my tattoo was 'simplistic' and 'hipster'. But finally, after convincing her to play along, she had given me the ideas for what all to try and do to the tattoo to possibly open up a communication channel with Loki.

_As I've said... none of it worked._

Luckily, my new friend agreed to eat lunch with me again and this time I tried to press her for different information.

"Wow, you're really taking this 'helping Loki with new followers' joke as far as possible, aren't you?" I could tell by her tone that she thought it was both ludicrous but also entertaining.

"It's for a story I want to maybe write," the lie had left my lips before I could even think about it. Maybe the deception had come so easily because part of me had always wanted to take up writing, but then again it could have been contributed to my newly anointed deity.

"Well, why don't you start a blog then? I'm sure you could get followers that way and also write some?" her questioning was followed by a pitying expression as she slid the last of her chips my way. It was then that I realized that I'd been hungrily eyeballing her food. Again.

Sweet, innocent, pure Megan still had not fixed the payroll issue that had left me high and dry of money for more than four weeks now. The first time I'd failed to receive a paycheck, I had swiftly depleted my savings to pay up on two months of rent and utilities. The urge had just come over me and when the second weekly check had failed to deposit into my account, I had known that I had made the right decision.

Until this moment, when I wished I'd saved just a little bit more so that I could actually afford to eat more than one meal a day. Which I normally saved for breakfast. It was no longer lasting me through most of the day.

Through a mouthful of chips, I mumbled, "A blog? You really think that could work?"

"Yeah. You can keep track of how many people are 'following' and also maybe convince them to do silly stuff. Or whatever it is you need for this story."

I continued chewing while tapping my fingers against the table. My mind was buzzing with all the possibilities. It couldn't hurt to try. Especially if it worked.

~~~

The next day, I sat miserably at my computer. My fingers mindlessly typing the words playing in my ears even though not a lick of it stuck to my brain.

The night before I had stayed up way too late researching everything I could about blogging and current day Loki events. Which meant I'd unfortunately seen a lot of stuff involving New York and the Avengers.

I hadn't viewed anything too graphic, but by the time I'd finished setting up the blog and gone to bed... my mind had continued running with endless speculations about what the hell was I thinking to accept this gig.

But mostly querying why the hell Loki so desperately wanted human worshippers.

After a few moments, I had realized that the audio had stopped playing in my ears. I closed out the file and went back into the client's email to download the second soundbite.

On par with my bad luck streak, the browser's loading icon slowly spread across the top bar before the whole screen went white and the 'no internet connection' page appeared.

With an exasperated groan, I banged my head against the desk. Seriously? Today? Right now?

I went through the normal motions of trying to get the internet to reconnect before finally putting in a call to Trisha. Who legitimately laughed at me and then giggled while stating, "I'll be there right after I finish up this other work order, sweetie."

My plan had been to just sit there and wait for her to arrive. But the browser page suddenly blinked and was replaced by the new 'unable to load' screen that featured the dinosaur jumping game: T-Rex Runner.

With a relieved sigh, I perked up a little and started rapping away at the up arrow key. It was honestly shocking that the company hadn't found a way to ban this game.

The little dinosaur ran. And ran. And jumped over cacti and birds while increasingly starting to run faster. Once or twice I would goof and have to start over, but about the third time, I found my little T-Rex icon starting to do random things.

His mouth would abruptly open and snap at birds before I could jump over them and infrequently he would do a full spin while midair.

At first, I thought this was something new added to the game as a means of distracting the player. It worked another two rounds but I finally found myself getting used to it enough to keep playing.

It was on the seventh playthrough that the pixelated T-Rex completely vanished from the screen and reappeared as a two-bit man.

Judging by the little green eye on the side of him I was willing to bet it wasn't just any man.

"Mortal," the synthetic voice hummed through my headset, causing me to leap back and snatch my hands away from the keyboard.

The new jumper continued on in the game without my help. Easily running and hopping over any obstacles; including the ones that weren't originally in the game.

"You haven't committed any acts for me yet."

Furiously, I jabbed a finger at the screen and accusingly whispered to him, "You didn't actually tell me how to do that and also I don't have any money for whatever hairball scheme you wanted."

"Wait a minute," his digital-self huffed before stomping his little feet into the ground and forcing the game to stop moving around him. A bird hovered awkwardly a few inches away from his head as he resumed, "Much better. Anyway, so Megan hasn't fixed her simpleton mistake yet? Well, that can be your first favor. Why didn't you tell me sooner?"

It took everything in me not to lose my cool and scream with a room full of people to witness my breakdown, "You didn't tell me how to get a hold of you!" My reply was just boisterous enough to temporarily catch the attention of the desk closest to me and the guy gave me a puzzled glare before going back to his audio.

"Oh dear. Are you saying that the paper was blank?" his words were very clearly followed by a snicker. I so dearly wished I would punch the tiny digital Loki.

I took a deep breath and just stared hard at his little green eye. I wasn't going to get in trouble at work because he was an omnipotent asshole.

"You must not be believing in me hard enough," my eyes widen in anger and he truly laughed before following up with, "I'm just joking, Midgardian. Check it again when you get home. It should tell you my price for your favor."

My lips opened to ask him another question, but I was cut off by a finger tapping rapidly at my shoulder. I immediately whipped my head around and looked up to meet Trisha's excited face.

"Hey, you really started that blog, didn't you? I had to fix the internet on the sixth floor and I Googled some random words to test it and the first thing that popped up was a blog that was worded exactly like your story!"

Quickly, I let my eyes flick back to the monitor and saw that the T-Rex was back and dismally being stabbed by the bird. 'Game Over' prominently stamped next to his head.

I glanced back at Trisha and wearily mumbled, "Yeah, yeah, yeah. I decided to actually do it."

"Well, I went ahead and started following it," as she chatted she gently pulled my headset off and motioned for me to get out of her way, "I'm curious to see what you manage to come up with."

Once I was out of her way, and she was decidedly emerged into fixing my computer, I gave myself a moment to close my eyes and take a good, long peaceful breath.

I was mentally telling myself that I was not only going to make the blog work but I was going to get my promised favors one way or another. No Norse God would be playing me for a fool.

~~~

That evening I had all but rushed back to my apartment. Shoes were kicked off my feet and sent flying into the bedroom, jacket haphazardly tossed on the back of the sofa, and my hair managed to escape the hair tie just enough to make me look a mad woman.

A mad woman on a mission.

I had sunk to my knees next to the altar and fumblingly knocked over a candle and rattled the potted fake plant while trying to get my hands on the scrolls.

I couldn't remember which was which, so I opened the first one and lazily dumped the contract back onto the shrine. My fingers shakingly unwound the second one and I sucked in a harsh gasp at the sight of a single sentence on the once blank parchment.

"I will require an act of mischief that will leave Megan fully humiliated."

My hands and the paper curled up into my lap as I tilted my head up and gaped at the ceiling.

How the hell was I suppose to do that?

~~~

_**Meanwhile...** _

~~~

"Sire?"

_Silence._

"Sire?"

"Why do you call him that? He's nothing but a monster and prisoner now."

The first guard seemed hesitant to say anything but finally did while fidgeting his fingers against his spear, "He wasn't stripped of his title. Loki is still a Prince of Asgard, nay?"

His companion glanced away, towards the glowing light of the cell, before returning the guard's inquisitive stare with his own harden glare.

"He might as well have been. For what he did to Jotunheim and Midgard," and with that, the second guard angrily turned back towards the main staircase and started marching back to his post.

The first guard remained a touch longer than necessary before he also left and marched back. His mind carefully reciting the information he was supposed to tell the Prince, over and over, so that he may not forget it. Next time he would let Loki know the exact words the Queen wanted to send to him.

However, said God of Mischief, was surprisingly ignorant of the events that had happened right outside his cell.

The royal guards had found him sitting in the far corner of his cell.

Back propped up against the white wall and his legs spread languidly out in front of him. His hands were just barely moving; fingers drawing invisible symbols against the floor next to each hip. His eyes were painfully shut tight and his lips fluttered as incoherent words tumbled from them.

Loki had one task he needed to accomplish.

_Preferably, before the All-Father figured out about it._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> More thanks because you all are super cool.


End file.
